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Hello Freedom + How Can I Keep from Singing  +  You are in My Seat!

Hello Freedom + How Can I Keep from Singing + You are in My Seat!

Good Morning from Warren Grove, Prince Edward Island

Put the kettle on and let’s have a chin wag.

The Island's Covid News as of April 1. 

It is Easter weekend. A time when Christians observe the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. I feel it is a more transformational holiday than Christmas.

Even wonder, about 'the' resurrection? Myth, Mystery of Fact? Take a peak at this video on Ask Questions. 

The spiritual life of one person should never be a carbon copy of that of another. ~ Benner

Last weeks blog was about kindness.

The longer I live, the more I notice how valuable it is to do one simple thing: be kind.
- When someone does a good job, tell them.
- When someone makes a mistake, forgive them.
- When someone tells you their problems, listen.
Being kind barely costs a thing. You'll hardly remember you did it, but the other person may never forget that you did. ~ James Clear, Author

Forgiveness is the theme of Easter.

In any bond of depth and significance, forgive, forgive, forgive. And then forgive again. The richest relationships are lifeboats, but they are also submarines that descend to the darkest and most disquieting places, to the unfathomed trenches of the soul where our deepest shames and foibles and vulnerabilities live, where we are less than we would like to be. Forgiveness is the alchemy by which the shame transforms into the honor and privilege of being invited into another’s darkness and having them witness your own with the undimmed light of love, of sympathy, of nonjudgmental understanding. Forgiveness is the engine of buoyancy that keeps the submarine rising again and again toward the light, so that it may become a lifeboat once more. ~ John Lewis

To discuss forgiveness in relation to my own story involves going over and through the valleys of shame and guilt associated with poor decisions and actions. Fortunately, for me and those around me I have come to understand, accept and internalize the reasons for Christs death and resurrection. 

David G. Benner, PhD, is an internationally known depth psychologist, author, and wisdom teacher. His life's work facilitates human unfolding through a journey of awakening and transformation. Dr. Benner has said, “Self-acceptance always precedes genuine self-surrender and self-transformation.”

And I appreciate the non-judgmental approach he shares when he says, “the spiritual life of one person should never be a carbon copy of that of another.”

I learned forgiving does not mean forgetting. When we forgive a person, the memory of the hurt still stays with us; but forgiveness changes the way we remember it though.

I know for too many years, I carried resentment and hurt. 

When we forgive the adults of years past or our friends for breaking a trust we no longer have to experience ourselves as the victims of events we had no control over. Taking responsibility for one's life and outcomes converts a curse into a blessing.

Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does in large the future.
~ Paul Boese
The only people we can change is ourselves. Forgiving others is the beginning of healing our own hearts.

Forgiving others and ourselves reclaims our dignity! 

Forgiveness, thus, liberates not only the other but also ourselves.

Our hearts long for perfect love; it is how we are wired. We were made in the image of it.  We all want peace. Daily I need to remind myself to forgive; I can't expect to receive that perfect peace if I don't.

The only perfection we will experience in life is accepting perfection is impossible to get. We just need to surrender to it, lean into it and keep trying. 

"The only way to learn forgiveness is to be betrayed. You might understand the intellectual concept of forgiveness, but you will only learn how to truly forgive when someone has done something that requires you to love them and let it go. Life demands these hurtful experiences for you to learn how forgiveness feels, it could be no other way. If there is anyone in your life that you must forgive, instead of seeing them as someone who has hurt you, try to see them as someone who was sent to teach you forgiveness and thank them for this precious gift - then forgive them, and let it go."

~ Jackson Kiddard

In an article written by the Mayo Clinic Staff, they cite the downsides of holding a grudge are that you:

  • Bring anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience
  • Become so wrapped up in the wrong that you can’t enjoy the present
  • Become depressed or anxious
  • Feel that your life lacks meaning or purpose, or that you’re at odds with your spiritual beliefs
  • Lose valuable and enriching connectedness with others

The benefits of forgiving someone are many. They list the benefits that come from forgiving someone are that you have:

  • Healthier relationships
  • Greater spiritual and psychological well-being
  • Less anxiety, stress and hostility
  • Lower blood pressure
  • Fewer symptoms of depression
  • Stronger immune system
  • Improved heart health
  • Higher self-esteem

When you measure the downside of holding a grudge versus the benefits of forgiving it is a pretty compelling argument for why you should just forgive whoever hurt your feelings and move forward.

One trick to help might be to print off a notecard with the benefits of forgiving on one side and the downside of holding a grudge on the other side. Then keep the card with you so whenever someone hurt your feelings you can pull out your card and remind yourself how you would rather move forward.

Stop stewing and start doing. Forgive.

Happy Easter,

With love from Prince Edward Island,

Bruce & Shirley, Lauren, Emily, and pet cats Rocky, Bobbi & Millie, the Aussie dog

PS. Your Morning Smile: 

A German Shepherd, Doberman and a cat have died. All three are faced with God, who wants to know what they believe in.

The German shepherd says, “I believe in discipline training and loyalty to my master.”

“Good,” says God. “Then sit down on my right side. Doberman, what do you believe in?”

The Doberman answers, “I believe in the love, care and protection of my master.”

“Ah, yes,” said God. “You may sit to my left.”

Then he looks at the cat and asks, “And what do you believe in?”

The cat answers, “I believe you’re sitting in my seat.”



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Comments

Lynn - April 5, 2021

As always, a nugget or two to contemplate. Thanks, as always, for your willingness to share.
May the blessings of the Easter message be yours this day and throughout the year!
Lynn

Julia Richardson - April 4, 2021

Perfect song for a beautiful morning in Michigan! Have a blessed Easter.

Angela Canales - April 4, 2021

Your blog was the first thing I saw this morning.All I could say was wow! You really nailed it . Thank you so very much. I hope that you, Shirley and your family have a blessed Easter.

Kathryn Zaengle - April 4, 2021

Brue, thank you so much for the insightful blog on forgiveness. I feel that I am just learning to accept that Jesus forgives us so that we can forgive others and therefore be forgiven ourselves. I went through a very sad divorce years ago and have been looking for ways to forgive my ex-husband but haven’t been able to make the breakthrough. I feel that I am very close to being able to do that and your words have encouraged me to a greater extent. The music was wonderful. I hope that I will be able to return to worship soon, in person, singing hymns as we always do in the Methodist church. I wish you and your family a very joyous Easter.

Cynthia - April 4, 2021

I have leaned heavily upon the Cross, my whole life.I have forgiven 70 × 7 and then some.My journey, I have spoken a whisper and the rest is in quiet. God knows.He continues to heal my soul and spirit.I’ve had to try each and every day in struggle without support.I have a small circle of those I cherish and honor.Bruce, you are one.May God bless us so that we may bless others.He does.The best is yet to come.
Music is the beating of the heart.Choirs are missed and solo’s seem to be on youtube.
This morning was more than tears.Keep the faith.
Blessings and love,
Cynthia

Janet Dickie - April 4, 2021

Wishing you , Bruce , Shirley and family a very blessed Easter ! Thanks for the wonderful message of forgiveness ❤️I especially love the truth that appreciating forgiveness can only be learned by being wronged – and how we can turn that into the teachable moment of being thankful the situation happened so we too can truly appreciate how to forgive

Phil Britton - April 4, 2021

So appropriate for the season. Needless to say the Spirit is alive and well in you as you share each week thoughts that are never really aware in the daily bustle of life. Opening your Blog from start to finish is a wove tapestry of refreshing support from the week just finished. Yet it provides a new light for the week to come. A cruise of many years ago brought us to a place of great Preserves. Now while the Preserves are still there the icing comes each Saturday in your Blog. Free and from the heart. God Bless you and your this Easter Season.

Sue Kay - April 3, 2021

What an awesome blog today,Bruce. The message loud and clear. The NYC choir and music was so fitting. Happy Easter from Moncton. Hope the bubble opens soon, we do need to visit. Lloyd and Sue

Jennifer Sue - April 3, 2021

Yes! Jesus came to do His Father’s will all because He Loves US! 💖
This is truly Good News for all who will believe and accept His forgiveness! Hallelujah! What a Savior!!!
The choir was fabulous!! Our church choir still continues praising Jesus in song!
Oh Glorious Resurrection Day!!
Thanks for the blog! God Bless you on my favorite island!! I hope to visit again one day…

William Michael Power - April 3, 2021

Easter as a time for forgiving. I can work with that, or I can try. Thank you!

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